Monday, March 17, 2014

"You guys are like so perfect!"

"You guys are like so perfect!"

 
I have been told countless times that Nick and I are perfect together. I don't know why, but it has always rubbed me wrong when people use that word: perfect. It's like they're setting a standard for our relationship that it is impossible for us to live up to. But then I got to thinking, why do they think we're so perfect. The answer is pretty simple. 

1. We have never been in a "fight".

We have argued, yes. We have been in disagreements, yes. And we have sometimes hurt each others feelings, yes. But we have never been in a fight. We have never called each other names. We have never, not even once, yelled at each other. When we disagree, because let's be honest, every couple does now and again, we take a few minutes apart. We go into separate rooms and we calm down. I personally play a game on my phone to distract myself. As far as to what he does, I honestly couldn't tell you. But once we're both calm we talk. We work through it together. 

He is an extremely kind and patient man. I, on the other hand, have a short temper sometimes. And more often than not I have a fast tongue that speaks before my mind can tell it not to. There have been times when we've been in a disagreement and I have said something that I shouldn't have. Something that if the roles were reversed, and he would have said it to me I probably would have been infuriated and yelled back. But he never once has. And he has super thick skin too. So he knows how to handle my fast tongue.

There has only been one time in our entire relationship I can recall saying something that actually hurt his feelings. And the thing is I didn't even mean to. But the instant hurt I saw in his eyes instantly broke my heart. Which brings me two number two...


2. When you're wrong, apologize.

I am very prideful. "I'm sorry" are some of the hardest words for me to say. But when I'm wrong, I admit it. And so does he when he's wrong. It's amazing how saying "I'm sorry" when you're wrong instead of holding on to your pride can turn what would have otherwise been a blowout, into a small argument filled with plenty of makeup.........cuddles ;).


3. Arguments are private. Not for Facebook. 

Have you ever seen Nick are I post anything bad about he other on Facebook? No. Why? Because are a private matter and not for you Aunt Sue, second cousin twice removed and mama to read. The only person I have ever said a bad word about Nick to is my best friend. If you have problems, that's okay. But not everybody needs to know about them. If you need to blow off stem to one friend, that's one thing. But if you find yourself bad mouthing your significant other, maybe you should be rethinking your relationship.

Plus, nobody else really cares about your problems. Have you ever noticed that when someone is trashing their significant other, all their "friends" are like "yeah (s)he totally sucks. I don't even know why you're with them. they're so dumb and stupid" and yet when you make up their tune changes to, "omg I know you guys would make up! you guys are like totally made for each other"?

That's why you should never take public opinion about your arguments. People like drama. They will feed into you until you're convinced that the other person is the worst person in the world. If you're going to vent to somebody, make sure it's somebody you can trust. When I vent to my best friend she will let me blow off steam and say why I'm upset, but if I'm in the wrong, she makes sure I know that as well. She tried to get me to see things from his point of view.


We are in no way a perfect couple, but we do have a pretty good relationship. I love him with all my heart. I believe, as cliche as it sounds, that we were made for each other. He knows me better than I know myself. I am so grateful I found the person I want to spend the rest of my life with at such a young age.


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